Always by myself,
Never any friends,
Basically a hermit,
No one caring about,
Me, the loner.
Wow, I remember being really proud of this, I think.
“This” is a binder is full of poetry I’d written in Middle School. The pages of poems, some of which are carefully pencil-marked with notes for revision, are neat, and I can see how much care I put into compiling my work.
As I look over these poems at the age of 26, however, I feel embarrassed by my juvenile writing skills—the awkward similes, the lack of diverse diction, the overuse of exclamation points and commas. Then, I remind myself that it doesn’t matter how terrible I think this poetry is.
What matters is that these poems represent my origins as a writer. They showcase the age in which I grew to learn and love creative writing.
In school and at home, I’d always been a quiet girl, but, with the help of my seventh grade English teacher, I found an outlet for my voice through writing. Writing gave me the therapeutic freedom I needed to talk about my fears of growing up, my dissatisfaction with my family life and my feelings of being an outsider as a Puerto Rican in an elitist private school. I knew, then, that I wanted to be a writer.
Today, I keep my passion for writing alive by writing for you.
I believe in the necessity of writing privately, but I cannot imagine my life without the relationships I’ve built by sharing my writing publicly too.
I’m realizing that when I look back at that binder full of poetry from my youth, I need to put aside my embarrassment.
Instead, I should feel grateful because I wouldn’t be where I am today as a writer if I hadn’t started there.
I strive to share my words in ways that not only help me but also impact and motivate my readers. As the saying goes, I must take great risks in writing to reap great rewards from it. I must continually dig deep within myself, to think honestly about my experiences as a woman, a mother and a human being in order to share them in meaningful ways with others.
Getting to the point where I can be completely candid with you has not been an easy road, especially since I often worry about people having negative reactions to my writing. Yet, your responses have been overwhelmingly positive.
I am so grateful to you for truly making Equis Place a safe space for me to express my voice. Please share your voice below by linking up ANY post, as long as its original, to Your Place @ Equis Place. I look forward to reading what you've written!
I Want to Know:
- What are your origins as a writer?
- Why do you love writing?
- What scares you about writing?
This post is also linked to Things I Can't Say.